The Meditation of a Concerned Heart
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Its 5 o'clock in the morning, my alarm rings, I snooze it and try to continue my sweet dream from where the alarm intruded. My alarm rings again. *phew* with a sigh I ask myself two questions-- “Is it 5 am already?” or “Did I set my alarm wrong?” I reach out for my watch to confirm the time. Oh dear, it’s really 5 am. A premonition of a hectic day ahead makes me wish the night was starting all over.
Still caught between the land of my dreams and the real world, I manage to mutter three words “THANK YOU JESUS”. In a state of somnambulation, with my brown eyes half closed, I slowly drag myself to the bathroom like a tortoise trying to win a race in the animal kingdom. The only swift thing that happens at this moment is the speed with which my bladder pours out its contents. I return back to my bedside, and in obedience to the word that says “Seek him early...” I go down on my knees to say my morning prayers. I worship the Lord; give him great thanks and pray about many other things. I try to pray for the missing girls, the Chibok girls, the innocent girls who have been abducted for more than 50 days now but I am lost of words. My mind travels to Borno State, its eyes searching for the truth. The deeper my thoughts go, the taller they become. So many questions run through my mind....
Where are the girls now? Are they still in the Sambisa forest? Are they in Chad? Have they been sold to traffickers? Are all of them still alive? Are they sex slaves to all those cannibals? Are they being tortured? Are some of them so stubborn and resistant? Are they being forced to become Muslims? Are they scared? Are they hopeless? How often do they cry? How often do they pray? Maybe this is all a scam, a deep conspiracy. Maybe the girls are well taken care of, because at least if they were to be sold they had to be sold in good conditions, right?
What about the parents? How do they sleep at night? How painful and hardened can their hearts be right now? How much do they miss their children? What about the thousands of people praying for the release of these girls? I mean, since we can’t all be leaders, or soldiers or experts, one thing we have in common is that we can pray. Are we not praying enough? Are our prayers not sincere enough? Is anyone listening to our cries? Is a solution still on the way? Should we be anxious or patient? Is this part of the divine plan? Was this destined to happen?
What about all the prayer warriors, and the generals of God on earth? Just like God’s prophets in the Old Testament, can’t they just say a word in the name of the Lord and let all these terrorists die? I guess it’s a divine mystery I don’t understand yet. Do you remember the angel in the Bible that went out to the camp of the Assyrians and struck out 185,000 soldiers in one night? If only he could just visit the camp of these terrorists. I pray so.
Then I think of all the comic characters, Superman, Spiderman, Wolverine, Batman, all with supernatural powers, and for a brief moment I get mad at the creators of these comics. They have succeeded in burying images of superheroes so deep in our sub conscious that a tiny little part of us wish they existed. Now where are they when we need them? Condemned to life imprisonment inside our own television sets, not so? What a pity!!! Mtchewww!!
Who has the answer to all these questions? Can you tell me? Or am I asking the wrong questions? *Sigh* At this point, my heart bleeds tears. My mind returns from a futile journey, a journey that disrupts my morning devotion. I simply recite the Lord’s Prayer and rise up to embrace what the day has in store for me.
One fact remains, the girls are missing, the search continues and while we pray for them to be found, more people have lost their lives to bomb blasts, even more than the amount of girls missing, including children. Some of these people also prayed for the return of these girls but unfortunately they have died at the mercy of the same demons behind the abduction. When you see the state of some survivors in the hospitals, you can’t help but wonder if death is not better. My people, WHEN WILL ALL THIS STOP? Do you know that the Malaysian Airlines Flight MH370 has not been found? Will this be the same fate of our girls? God forbid!! I forbid!!! And hope you forbid it too.
Most people live in fear, the kind of fear that cuts deeper than swords, the fear that kills them even before death arrives. Amaka and Chisom could not follow me to the cinema; Aunty Chioma hardly goes to church on Sundays, Mrs Bola cannot see herself shopping at Shoprite again; all because of the fear of bomb blasts. The question is, are you really safe? Can you really protect yourself from all the dangers around you? The death toll caused by bomb blasts and other terrorist attacks should not make us forget that people still die from simple things like, bike accidents, slipping down on wet floors, sleeping and not waking up, headaches etc.
If all the market women refused to go to the market because of the fear of bomb blasts how will we buy food items? How will they make money? If all the schools shut down because of the fear of abduction, how will a nation get educated? If all the soldiers choose to stay with their families and not go to war, who will fight these terrorists? But wait ohh!! Hold up a minute!! What if all these terrorists stopped the incessant killings and bade us farewell in peace? Will they die in their sleep? Gosh!!
Last time I checked, the fear of accidents never stopped anyone from driving on the road. At such times, if you believe in God, in heaven and in hell, I think the greatest fear should not be the fear of dying, but the fear of not making heaven if you die. Think of all the good you have done in life, all the meaningful sacrifices you have made and imagine that it doesn’t take you to heaven...hmmm!! Personally I don’t want to even imagine. Its either HEAVEN or...He..HEAVEN!!
These are perilous times. We need to thoroughly search our hearts and try our possible best to consciously live a life that is pleasing to God, so that even if death takes us unawares, our souls might be left rejoicing in heaven. You can’t afford to lose faith in the fact that good always conquers evil, you can’t afford to lose faith in yourself, you can’t afford to lose faith in God and in the wisdom of Mahatma Gandhi “You must not lose faith in humanity. Humanity is like an ocean, if a few drops of the ocean are dirty, the ocean does not become dirty.” Don’t stop praying!! Don’t stop believing!! Don’t stop loving!!