I would

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“I would”

If you had the power to change something, what would it be?

Walking in a cold night, looking at the incredible moon as white as a jasmine flower, I was thinking about this deep question, but suddenly a red Chevrolet distracted me, it was a Malibu 1981 identical to my grandfather's. It passed quickly on the narrow street, flashbacks started passing through my mind, followed by a smile.

I 've heard quite a lot of people that tell me:

"I would definitely change poverty" and someone else tells me, “I would definitely change injustice," and another person tells me "I would totally change abortion",  and the last one tells me "I would change that there were no more abandoned children."

The sound of the rain falling on the street won't stop, and while I was looking for a place where I could avoid rain, I saw a cardboard ( sign) outside of a cafe that said: "Only today, homemade bread in a better price." I bet the signal is there for a minimum of 3 days.”, I thought as I rolled up my eyes.

If we had the power, we would all want something to change.

But… what if we already have it? Why instead of saying “I would love to change”, “that would be pretty nice”, “it would help plenty of people”, “it would definitely change the world for good”. Why don’t we start by saying “I will change” instead of “I would change”?

Why do we don’t start by changing ourselves?  Why do we think we have no power?

I entered the cafe and followed the girl that would assign me a place.

The cafeteria looked comfortable and it had the smell of freshly baked bread that I love. I removed my light brown-grey long coat and laid it on the chair.

Why are we so afraid of facing people?  Why do we conform by staying in our comfort zone instead of going out and look for what makes us happy?  Why do we always exclude ourselves and look for a way to blame someone or even something else? Why are we so ashamed of what we are?

Why are we so scared of what the world is?

Because we are human, we are fragile, we make mistakes and we fall.

I could continue to ask thousands of questions that nowadays damage us and makes us feel guilty in a huge way. Teenagers, adults and children have lost in a gradual way identity, values, respect and love, and sadly resentment and violence are what dominates us. We have become very dependent people. Vices, debauchery, breaking the rules and causing harm to others. We have really stopped being interested in what really matters.

We care about the most superficial things and we leave the fundamental ones on the side. And that causes us pain, suffering, sadness, shame, frustration and helplessness. But as they say: "Without suffering how can we know happiness?"  And that depends on us, we must accept our mistakes and decide to get up and move forward, but for that, we should want to do it, and after achieving it, help someone else that need us, because at the end of the day, what is the point of giving everything if you don’t think about the others?                                                                                                

-"Hello!" "My name is Leo and today I will take care of you." "You will like something to drink?"

- "Oh hi!" "Umm yes please, I'll take a Jazmine tea.”

-"Perfect," "It will be ready in a minute."

And I do not judge, but neither I justify, I just try to understand and try to find a solution because I also include myself in all this because I  have also made mistakes, and I have fallen, and I’ve been selfish and I’ve also disobeyed, I have been angry, I have been frustrated and like every human, I have fallen again, and again, and again.

"Here it is," Leo said.

"That's great, thanks!" I replied before I  grabbed my hot cup, tried my tea and burned my tongue.

Pope Francis said in the World Youth Day, 2019 “ The real victory isn’t to fall, but not to remain fallen”

And you know, I’m not trying to justify ourselves. What I’m trying to say is that we must learn to know ourselves and yes, sometimes we don’t like what we are, so we must change, keep going, transcend and above all, grow and accept that we are not perfect, and let me tell you that if you are looking to be perfect, I am sure  that is not the way I would suggest you go to, because our fears are like water, that falls in a waterfall and that stays stagnant until more water comes and replaces the one that was there, just like fears.

We must start acting more and less talking, as they say,  "an action is worth a thousand words."  I need you, yes, the world needs you, humanity needs you, God needs you, so we must be together instead of being more and more separated each day because human values are disappearing.

I thought as I opened my little notebook, I took my thick-tipped black pen and as a title, I wrote: " I would".

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