The journey of finding what makes my heart beat

Books and words

I wrote my first meaningful story at my age of 13. I was in my study table, and suddenly the idea of the story hit my mind. Even before that, I tried to write story but those ended up in failed attempts.

The next day, I showed the story to my friends and they praised it. Few days after that, my (now former) best friend told me to write a story on the theme ‘A friend in need is a friend indeed’, and she would write one too. I wrote, and that one was praised by her too.

Starting then, every week we wrote stories on a topic. Those were not something that grandiose. Those stories were kind of immature, stuck in the same themes again but they were my first steps towards writing.

At the end of the year, my friend left school, but she still gave me topics to write. After a time being, I decided to start independent writing, not based on a certain topic. I had the fear in my mind that I could not be able to get out of the same topics, but still I clung to my decision.

I kept my habit of writing a good number of stories every year alive. And like that, I spent three more years. Writing was merely my hobby.

My first turning point was joining Voices of Youth in 2021. I didn't know that I could write nonfiction too, and in English. It was a huge step. I took that step. I thought that I would stop after publishing a few writing, but before knowing it, I developed a passion for blogging and became unstoppable.

My second turning point was when I started re-writing my stories in English and joined Write the World. I initially started it because one of my foreign friends offered to read my stories. Then I looked for a platform to publish them and found Write the World. The comments and reviews that I received from the readers were positive and uplifting. They made me confident, they made me think that I did my work well and they inspired and encouraged me to keep going.

Little my little I was realizing that I have a passion for writing. Writing comforted me greatly. When I couldn’t concentrate in studies, I would start penning down my thoughts in the side of my exercise book. When thoughts seem to burden my head, I wrote my heart out. Developing my characters, writing them down made my heart flutter. Receiving a kind comment from my reader made my day and inspired me.

When I was younger, I thought science would be my future studying subject. Back then, I liked reading science books and science was my favourite subject. In examinations, I got good marks.But I was unaware of one thing. Getting good marks, what you are good at and what you love - are different.

What excites you and makes your heart beat?

BTS leader RM asked in his speech. I didn’t understand the depth of the question back then. But three years later, I finally got the answer.

Science can’t make my heart beat. Literature makes my heart beat.

Looking back, literature is something I am always passionate about. But I didn't see it. I don't know exactly when, maybe in the lockdown, I started to think about it. I start thinking about choosing a path related to literature.

In the book The Book Thief ​​​, the writer talked about the power of words. Words. I want to be someone who will always stay close to words and human world. Literature captures humans in words. When I write, sometimes I feel the words. I want to cherish that feeling, always. 

I am differently able, which means I am disabled in a way but able in another way. Just like that, I am unable to do some things without other people’s support. But I am capable of writing, expressing myself and doing what I am passionate about on my own.

I may seem good at studies, and successful in some other paths. But I can only leave my mark on the world by doing what I love, what I am passionate about. Otherwise, I won’t be able to give my best.

And finally I came to the realization that for me, writing is the way to leave my mark on this world. The way I was searching for ever since I was young. Not study, not success. My passion is my way.