One Year Ago

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A little more than one year ago, was a typical day. I woke up, got ready, and left for school. Little would I know what would follow. The day was all the usual, teachers taught, students sat in their seats each with their own definition of "listening". I had been on social media a lot recently and was hearing about this virus and how it was spreading relatively quickly. I was at an event a few weeks earlier and peers mentioned that their schools were closing down due to this virus. I almost laughed since I couldn't comprehend the idea of schools just closing down. Of course I was concerned but at that time it wasn't of too much of concern to me. Though after that one Friday's classes, I couldn't help suppress the feeling of anger inside. This virus was everywhere around us and I still attended the classes for that whole previous week. I decided to take action and released a "public statement" expressing my concerns about the virus and the response I thought of with closing down schools. 

I later got a response which led to a discussion with someone who explained the current situation and where things were at the time. It's hard to accept the inevitable, and I think we all learned that during this pandemic. School was shutdown. The place I went to on a near regular basis, now empty of youthful laughter and learning. The rest of the academic year was simple, but disastrous. There was no structure to our education which cannot be attributed to anyone for it was all unprecedented. I sat home, spent about an hour tops on "assignments" on material that wasn't very new to us. It was more of a pause with substance as if they wanted to teach, but just couldn't find how. Summer was rather usual though there was little to no travel due to most events being cancelled. As the sunny days began to conclude, I pondered the thought of a return to school. Soon we got word that we would still not be returning to school in person at the beginning of the year though we did learn that virtually, it would be more structured.

I felt an odd sense of relief, though it was short-lived. Worries flooded my head, and oddly, the anger I once had returned. I felt betrayed, left alone. Though I found great success in my independent studies, I couldn't bear that thought of what last year could've been. I didn't know what to blame, and as I reflect, I could have only had myself to blame.  If I sensed wrong, then I should have corrected it. For an injustice that we keep silence to, is an injustice we must accept blame for. I took too much pride in pursuing my future ambitions instead of focusing on the studies that set me up for the general future. 

I cannot say that I'm not grateful though for the opportunities that oddly this pandemic has provided. From getting more involved in my community, getting a kickstart on my future, to being allowed to truly share what I believe is my message, this pandemic fueled my efficiency and productivity. The heartbreaking pains of loss we have had over the course of these dark times oddly pushed me to work harder. It made me realize that if not now, then when. For years I have attended conferences where a similar message was pushed, though the true realization from the pandemic, put me into practice of that concept.

We are all taught about the Yin & Yang with how we have to take the good with the bad. The tragedy is real, but the lessons taught grow ever brightly. It's sad we have to learn this way, but that's how it's been. We learn through out mistakes. I hope we have truly learned our lesson and will seek to do everything in our power to prevent another tragedy of these sorts. 

One year ago...

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